160 The Ghost Monument

This is the one where the Doctor and her companions get picked up by 2 random pilots that are competing in a 7 galaxy race that ends on a planet that's made to kill you. And they both win.

Live from Master Closet Studios, you’re listening to the only podcast on the internet that’s been floating in space since last week. It’s the Noobs and the Whovian! 

My name is Austin and I’m the Whovian, and these are my sons Corbin and Tripp and we’re the noobs! 

This is the podcast that introduces a whole new generation to Doctor Who by watching an episode each week and discussing it from the perspective of a dad who’s seen it before, and two sons who haven’t. 

Welcome to Episode 160 covering season 11 episode 2: The Ghost Monument 

Super-short Recap 

This is the one where the Doctor and her companions get picked up by 2 random pilots that are competing in a 7 galaxy race that ends on a planet that’s made to kill you. And they both win.

Production notes

  • Story #278
  • Originally aired October 14, 2018 to 9 million UK viewers
  • Written by: Chris Chibnall
  • Directed by: Mark Tonderais
    • First black director in Doctor Who, though not the first person of color (as Waris Hussein directed the very first episode!)
    • Also directed some episodes of Gotham

Misc Trivia

  • New logo!
  • No more cold-opens
    • Coined by Gene Roddenberry. Defined as: Teaser, preferably three pages or less. Captain Kirk’s voice over opens the show, briefly setting where we are and what’s going on. This is usually followed by a short playing scene which ends with the Teaser “hook”
    • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_open 


  • Graham O’Brien – Bradley Walsh
    • Played the Pied Piper in The Sarah Jane Adventures
    • Most well-known as the presenter on a game show called The Chase
    • At 58, he’s the oldest actor to play an ongoing companion. Bernard Cribbins was older, but was more of a one-off companion
  • Epzo – Shaun Dooley
  • Angstrom – Susan Lynch
    • Downton Abbey
    • Ready Player One


  • Name of the episode spoken in dialogue?
    • Bunches 
  • Creature of the week
    • Sniperbots – is it morally wrong to shoot a robot?
      • I think Corbin has some feelings… 
    • The Remnants
      • Strips of sentient cloth
  • Jiggery Pokery
    • TARDIS 
      • Slight changes to the exterior – more of a tealish blue, sign has gone from black on white to white on black, St. John’s ambulance logo is gone
      • Big changes to the interior!
        • The entrance has moved from the front doors to the back wall of the police box, making it more like the diner TARDIS that Me & Clara took
        • Round things are back!
        • Crystalline motif
        • The time rotor (the uppy downy thingy)
          • First time since before Eight that it doesn’t reach to the top
          • First time it was anything but a transparent cylinder
        • If green was the color of Eleven, and blue was the color of Twelve, yellow is definitely the color of Thirteen
      • How was the doctor tracking it?
    • Sonic
      • She has a definite way of using the sonic – The Sonic Swoosh
    • Random 
      • To get around the translation matrix being missing, they had the medipods install universal translators
  • Jibberty Jabberty
  • Face Scronches
  • Name Dropping
    • The shades either belonged to Audrey Hepburn, or Pythagoras. Pythagoras never wore sunglasses! You obviously never saw him with a hangover!
  • The Doctor Apologises 
    • 3

Other stuff we noticed 

  • Never even heard of Moomanbeans

Who’s Who? 

  • Who is Ryan Sinclair?
    • Never ignore the wisdom of Graham
    • He refuses to call Graham “Granddad”
  • Who is Graham O’Brien?
    • Who is Yasmin “Yaz” Khan?
      • Sorry Yaz, forgot you were there!
    • Who is the Doctor?
      • Am I gonna die? Eventually, yes. It comes to us all. But not right now.
      • I’m good at old school
      • She was a hologram for 3 weeks
      • She’s a Grand Master Pacifist in Venutian Aikido
      • Very apologetic
      • Come to Daddy, I mean Mummy

    Can we talk about companions?

    • The loss of a companion and the doctor going it alone 
    • I made a big mistake, but I’m gonna fix it and get you all back home.
    • I promise, I’ll keep you alive and get you back home.

    Classic Who Connections

    • In the serial Enlightenment the Fifth Doctor and his companions find themselves on an Edwardian yacht in space and enter a space rally in order to win Enlightenment. Which is the ability to know your true purpose.
    • We see the Doctor use Venusian aikido again
    • We see the TARDIS dispensing food (naturally custard based) like it did in The Daleks

    Overall impressions

    • Overall rating out of 10
      • Jared – 7.5 – Space rallies
      • Austin – 7 clicking cigars
      • Corbin – 7 sentient strips of cloth
      • Tripp – 8 crap ships 
    • Creep Level – out of 500
      • Jared – 50
      • Austin – 100
      • Corbin – 50
      • Tripp – 40


    • Will they or won’t they?
      • Corbin – I hope not, but probably
      • Tripp – yes they will, but it’s gonna take 2-3 more episodes

    The Game Plan 

    Next week, we’re covering season 11 episode 3, Rosa.


    Noobs and the Whovian is a production of Master Closet Studios, where it’s always smaller on the inside. Your Senior Producer is Austin Reason. Our Audio Engineer is Thing One: Tripp Reason. Our Production Editor is the Other One: Corbin Reason. Special thanks to tardis.fandom.com for the trivia, and to Jared for the Classic Who Connection. Shout outs to Victor and Jared for their Patreon support.

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    Until next time, be safe if you can. But always. Be. Amazing.