Live from Master Closet Studios, you’re listening to the only podcast on the internet hosted by three guys whose names don’t translate: it’s the Noobs and the Whovian! 

This is the podcast that introduces a whole new generation to Doctor Who by watching an episode each week and discussing it from the perspective of a dad who’s seen it before, and two sons who haven’t.  

Welcome to Episode 83 covering series 6 episode 7: A Good Man Goes to War.

Super-short Recap

This is the one where the Doctor, Amy, Rory find out who River is! The Doctor calls in favors across the galaxy to rescue Amy and her baby, only to find out that the baby wasn’t really there, and actually SHE IS RIVER FLIPPIN SONG!

Remember that one?

Production notes

  • Story # 218
  • Originally aired June 4, 2011 to 7.51 million viewers
  • Written by: Steven Moffat
  • Directed by: Peter Hoar

Misc Trivia

  • Season 6, Episode 7 was also the 777th episode of Doctor Who to air.
  • There were supposed to be more soldiers in the Doctor’s army.
    • Ood Sigma was there, but the scene was cut
    • Captain Jack Harkness was originally in the script, but John Barrowman was busy filming Torchwood.
  • The “Good man” who went to war might actually refer to Rory.
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  • Name of the episode spoken in dialogue?
    • Demons run when a good man goes to war – Dorium Maldovar & River Song
  • Creature of the week
    • Headless Monks
      • There’s a theory that if Captain Jack had appeared, he would’ve been beheaded in the battle, hence the Face of Boe just being a head. This is unconfirmed.
  • Bow ties are cool
    • Melody coos. No it’s not, it’s cool.
  • Eye-patch Lady
    • She took the baby
    • Her name is Madame Kovarian and she’s out to kill the Doctor

Other stuff we noticed

  • We’re the thin fat gay married Anglican marines. Why would we need names as well.
  • The Doctor was referred to as a goblin and trickster in The Pandorica Opens
  • The Papal Mainframe herself

Who’s Who?

  • Who is Rory?
    • This is the single best cold open to a Doctor Who episode EVER! Come at me!
      • Shall I repeat the question?
    • Oh God, I was gonna be cool. I wanted to be cool.
    • Rory wasn’t even there in the beginning. Then he was dead. Then he didn’t exist. Then he was plastic.
  • Who is The Doctor? 
    • We haven’t seen him this vindictive since Ten trapped a little girl in a mirror for eternity.
    • Good men don’t need rules. Today is not the day to find out why I have so many.
    • He speaks baby! He speaks everything!
    • Have you ever had children?
    • The Time Lords became what they are after billions of years of exposure to the time vortex.
    • He remembers everyone
    • Doctor: the word for healer, wise man. We get that word from him. But if he continues on, what might that word come to mean? To the people of the Gamma Forests, the word “Doctor” means “mighty warrior.”
  • Who is River Song?
    • Apparently even the production staff was blown away by this one!

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Classic Who Connection

  • The Cybermen that are seen are supposed to be from Mondas, no from the parallel world.
  • When the doctor is assembling his army of people who owe him favors, we hear the a more Classic Who inspired landing sound. It has some of the sound effects from the original TARDIS takeoff in An Unearthly Child .

Overall impressions

  • Overall rating out of 10 – 
    • Jared – 9 Rivers in the forest
    • Austin – 10 turns twistier than a headless monk’s neck
    • Corbin –  9.5 Good men
    • Tripp – 10 adult babys
  • Creep Level – out of 500
    • Jared – 150
    • Austin – 75
    • Corbin – 75
    • Tripp – 200


  • What will happen with Eleven dying?
    • Corbin thinks this will be the end of series 6 and they will avert Eleven’s death.
    • Tripp thinks that the Doctor we saw die was a ganger.
  • Who is the impossible astronaut?
    • Corbin thinks it’s the little girl.
    • Tripp thinks it’s River.
  • Who is the little girl?
    • She’s a timelord
    • Corbin thinks she’s Amy’s daughter. 
      • Her regeneration and strength are a result of time travel.
    • Tripp thinks it’s River.
  • Who is River?
    • Corbin thinks she’s married to the Doctor. She’s in Stormcage for killing someone, even though not the Doctor.
    • Tripp thinks it’s obvious that she’s married to the Doctor, and she’s in Stormcage because she killed a ganger of the Doctor.she was put against the doctor and that’s why she is in jail.
  • Corbin’s whole theory
    • The girl, who is the impossible astronaut and River, kills the Doctor in the season finale and that is why she is in Stormcage. Also she is the Doctor’s wife 

The Game Plan 

  • Next week we’re covering season 6 episode 8: Let’s Kill Hitler.
  • After Night Terror, we’ll cover The Fourth Doctor story The Genesis of the Daleks, so make sure you get your free trial of BritBox via our link to Amazon below!
Be sure to catch the Classic Who episode by starting your free trial with BritBox on Amazon Prime Video!


Noobs and the Whovian is a production of Master Closet Studios, where it’s always smaller on the inside. Your Senior Producer is Austin Reason. Our Audio Engineer is Tripp Reason. Corbin Reason is our Production Editor. Special thanks to for the trivia, Jared for the Classic Who Connection. Shout outs to Victor and Jared for their Patreon support.

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